Sorry no posts since Wednesday. Life has been a bit crazy. Busy at work, doctor visits & Fertility Meds.
Today was the last day for the meds. All in all the meds weren't as bad as I had anticipated. Had a few headaches, some bruising at the injection sight and a road rage moment. LOL
So now we are praying and waiting.
The waiting I think is the worst. Getting excited and not knowing yes or no...I am trying to not get my hopes up. I plan on focusing on next year's NIAW and getting things started here in St. Louis, MO. We had not one thing going on for NIAW and I plan on changing that. I would like to get a Walk of Hope together and also a possible fundraiser. Not sure yet, but this is my focus from now on. Educating the public and sharing our story.
So hopefully it will make the waiting less hard. I have also been doing some reading.
Right now I am reading "While the Cradle is Empty"by John and Sylvia Van Regenmorter. Its a great book so far. I also have a giant stack from the library I need to start on. I will keep everyone updated on what I read and how it is.
Well I am off to bed and ready to start another week!
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Chances are you or someone you know has been effected by the painful disease Infertility. Whether they are currently carrying this burden or overcame it. It’s a painful road to travel in life. Infertility affects 1 in 8 couples and is now classifed by the American Fertility Association as a disease of the reproductive system.
This week is National Infertility Awareness Week. The theme for NIAW is “Don’t Ignore Infertility.”
What does the theme for NIAW mean to you?.
Does it mean you don’t ignore the signs of Infertility any longer and see a doctor?
Does it mean that you stop ignoring Infertility, come out of the closet and start educating yourself and others about the disease and how it can affect you and your loved ones?
It can mean a # of different things to different people, but to me, “Don’t Ignore Infertility” means the latter of the 2.
For a year my husband and I suffered in silence telling only certain people what we thought they needed to know and ignoring that we were being labeled as an Infertile Couple. I didn’t want to believe it. I ignored the fact that we might someday be one of the couples that do IVF, adopt or use a surrogate. We really didn’t educate ourselves or delve into the world of Infertility. I had the same belief as so many others that we are still young. And yes we maybe young, but my body says otherwise. I have an AMH problem that basically says I have old eggs for my age and by the time I am between the ages of 30 & 32 I may not have any viable eggs left for pregnancy. I am 28 now and want 3 children and have only 2-4 good years to do it.
While circumstance kept me from trying to start a family sooner (my husband and I have been married for almost 2 yrs and together for 3 1/2). So no delay there. But I truly wish I would have learned at a younger age I have medical problems that were going to make it difficult or near to impossible to have children naturally, if at all. And to know now it was only a few blood tests that found the medical conditions I have that are causing my husband and I to suffer from Infertility. Something as simple as a blood test that even your primary doctor can perform if looking for the right things. Had I known this in my early 20’s I could have prepared for my future emotionally, financially and marriage wise. While my husband has been wonderful through all of this I sometimes feel bad that because of marrying me he has had to endure all of this. But that is another blog for another time. :)
So in saying all of this my husband and I have decided to become a voice for Infertility and rather then letting it beat us we are determined to beat it. By sharing our story, educating our friends and loved ones and becoming advocates in our hometown of St. Louis as well as all over. I was shocked to learn at the local bookstore there was not a special section for Infertility books. They had maybe 8 in the women’s health section. The library has maybe 10-15 books. The biggest shock to me of all was St. Louis had nothing going on for the week of NIAW. My husband and I are determined to change all of this in the years to come so that Infertility is no longer ignored or overlooked.
Moving forward I encourage anyone reading this whether you suffer from Infertility or are a friend or loved one who knows someone suffering. Educate yourself, let your voice be heard, come out of the Infertility closet and give support to those around who are suffering. Let’s not Ignore this disease any longer!!
If you would like more information about Infertility or to let your voice be heard please visit the links below.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Since I started sharing my Infertility story last week I have met so many wonderful women. Not only thru Pinterest where I have an Infertility board, but also on the page I have created on Facebook. These women have all been saying to me that they feel alone. And I have agreed with them that I have felt the same sometimes on a daily basis. Yes we all have our husbands and family members to support us, but unless you have someone else around who is dealing with the same it is very lonely.
My husband and I were diagnosed with Unexplained Infertility. So we are not sure if it is something wrong with both of us or just me. In saying this when you feel like all of this is your fault and your partner is fine the feeling of loneliness can become greater. You start to feel that the one person who is also suffering doesn’t understand either.
I felt alone for sometime as my husband and I kept our Infertility private for quite awhile. Last year was our first year of dealing with IF and I was embrassed to say stuff to people. Didn’t want pity stares or people to feel they had to say something and most of the time that something was the complete wrong thing.
This year we have finally started being more vocal about what we are dealing with and at times it can be a good or bad thing. I will be honest I feel like I have gone thru more alone times since I did start talking about it. I think it is mostly due to the fact that people try to say things to be comforting or you voice your opinion and they become ignorant. In the last few weeks however since I shared my story on facebook and created a page I have met some truly amazing women and I also have a few friends that have shared their story with me that I would have never known otherwise.
In summing this all up and to make my point. Anyone out there dealing with Infertility you are Not Alone! I would strongly encourage you to make your voice heard and share your story. You just never know who else out there is dealing with the same.
Monday, April 23, 2012
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
A Little about myself.
My husband and I have been TTC for almost 2 yrs and we were just recently told by the doctor that he doesn’t know what the problem is. Basically unexplained infertility as he calls it. I do have a medical condition called MTHFR and I am on medication for it and the doc said it wasn’t a big deal since they found it in time. He is the 3rd specialist we have seen. I saw one Fertility specialist in the beginning, she was so cold and unfeeling. Very sad for the field she is in. My husband saw a Sexual Health Urologist and now we are on doctor #3. Its so frustrating.
Our insurance money has just ran out and now we are back to square one. Treatments and daily doctor visits are so expensive. Treatments range anywhere from $800 a cycle to $10,000 to $15,000 and doc visits are now $325 per visit. We were lucky for our insurance to cover the diagnostic process and testing, but where do we go from here? Anyone else dealing with the same issue.
I am new to all of this. Our first year of trying I was charting my ovulation and temperature and such, always thought the baby thing would happen on its own without any help. Now we are not so sure. Never thought I would be researching infertility and on the emotional roller coaster I have been on especially the last few months.
This is a very hard road to travel. My husband and I have been a support for each other. I won’t lie it has wore us thin a few times and my emotions and anger have been taken out on him. but our relationship is getting stronger thru all of this. My support system in the way of family friends that I have around me are great, but they don’t always understand. I feel like I am alone in this a lot of times with no one to talk to who can sympathize. All of our friends that got married around the same time as us are starting families and here me and my husband sit on the outside looking in.
I have lost some friends thru all of this. It is very upsetting, because I already feel alone and different from so many other women and then to lose friends is even harder. But I keep telling myself that if they couldn’t be by myside in one of the lowest points in my life and support me, then they weren’t true friends in the first place. A quote comes to mind “If you can’t handle me at my worst, than you don’t deserve me at my best.” Very well said I think.
Well I think that is all for today.
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