Dealing with the surreal feeling today that the Infertity roller coaster is all a bad dream and I will wake up. But when??? When will this bad dream be over with??? When will my arms no longer be empty???
The other difficult matter at hand is all of the babies being born to people I know or know of. It was difficult months ago to hear of their pregnancy announcements and now to hear of the birth is just as hard. You always carry the hope that maybe with all of the other announcements you receive you will get to share your own, but not the case. Months have passed and still here I sit. Does it ever get any easier?
Some days I am fine and don’t let it consume me, other days its all I can think about. I keep hearing just relax it will happen or oh its not the right time. You are still young is one of my favorites. Why does it matter how old I am and to keep being told we have plenty of time drives me insane!!! The longing to have a child is the same at any age, regardless if you are 28 or 38.
I am really at a loss and not sure of what to do, but pray. I had a 3 hour long meltdown a few Saturday’s ago, and that helped for a few days. I feel another one coming on, especially with the arrival of AF looming. UGH!!!